Pet loss and memory loss

This is Miasa from Japan, Making pet custom cushion by KNIT.

Today I would like to talk about memory loss, one of the difficult experiences I had when I lost my beloved dog.

*I’m not a doctor so I don’t have any technical knowledge about this. This is just my experience.

My memory has become hazy due to the worsening of my pet loss

Click here to read the story of when I became depressed .

The pain of losing my dog worsened and I fell into depression.

I experienced a lot of trouble and suffering at that time, but today I would like to talk about my experience with memory loss.

It wasn’t the kind of amnesia you see in movies or novels (such as not remembering one’s own name), but rather, I had partial loss of memory from the past, completely forgotten promises, and completely forgot painful experiences.

I couldn’t remember the timeline clearly either, and I couldn’t tell whether my memories were from the day before or the week before.

Specifically, after I lost my beloved dog, I found myself becoming more susceptible to stress, but (looking back now) I can hardly remember the painful events that caused that stress.

I think this experience was a good thing as it helped me forget about my unpleasant past.

However, there was a problem.

It was a forgetful plan.

I would completely forget things I had planned, such as dentist or hospital appointments, shopping plans, and even appointments with people or work, and I was unable to keep them.

This was very troubling for me.

I also had partial loss of memory from my daily life.

Even if we meet the same person again, we don’t remember where we went yesterday, where we went, who we met, or what we talked about.

Don’t make promises

This situation was very troubling for me, so I tried to avoid meeting people as much as possible during that time.

I explained the situation to my very close friends and made sure they understood before meeting me.

I also tried not to make any plans.

Especially not making promises to people.

I was worried about being a nuisance to my partner, so I didn’t make plans to go out and lived alone all the time.

What I did to make sure I didn’t forget the important things.

However, I still have to live my life interacting with other people. So I took the following measures.

Write it in your notebook or put it on your smartphone

I wrote down my plans and engagements in my notebook.

However, I can’t seem to get into the habit of looking at my planner.

So I put it on my smartphone calendar.

Still, I can’t get into the habit of looking at my schedule.

I’ve tried using the email reminder feature, but writing the email is a hassle.

In the end, I decided to turn to my family.

Tell someone about your business

I told my mother,

“I’m going to the hospital on XX day, so remember that.”

I asked them to let me know on the day.

Although it went well at first, I couldn’t rely on her forever. I asked my mother for help only two or three times.

The memory loss still persists (as of 2020)

This is a sad story, but my memory is still hazy and I can’t remember my schedule. (As of 2020)

We are improving little by little.

I’ve gotten back into the habit of looking at my planner, and my memory has mostly returned, but I still can’t live without it, and I can’t remember things that most people can easily remember.

I think I just have to learn to live with these symptoms.

It’s impossible to keep to a minute-by-minute schedule, but you can survive as long as you don’t push yourself too hard.

Related article: Pet loss and my depression