Coping When Pet Loss Becomes Unbearable

When I lost my beloved pet in around 2010, the overwhelming grief led to stress—and eventually depression. Thanks to several supportive people and through trial and error, I found ways to heal. Today, I’m honoring my pet’s memory and living each day with renewed strength.

In this post, I’ll share some key advice I received—along with personal insights that helped me move forward.

Struggling With Sleepless Nights After Pet Loss

During a particularly hard time, I confided in a physical therapist: “I can’t sleep.” She gently replied, “You don’t need to force sleep.”

I had believed I must fall asleep—and felt guilty when I couldn’t. This creates a vicious cycle. So, it’s okay to simply rest in bed without pressuring yourself to sleep.

You might scroll through your pet’s photos, read other owners’ grief‑stories online, or simply lie still. Even without sleeping, your body still rests.

On sleepless nights, I found comfort in gazing at the stars above my rural home, imagining that my dog Mook was shining somewhere up there.

Tips That Helped Me Find Rest Again

(These worked for me and may help you too.)

1. Bamboo charcoal pillow

I tried a pillow loosely filled with bamboo charcoal—popular among those with insomnia. It helped me sleep soundly at first, though restlessness returned on some nights. Eventually, however, rest became more consistent.

2. Meditation and soothing experiences

You don’t need formal practice. Listen to calming music, forest sounds, or ocean waves—or visit a waterfall. I found visiting shrines and sitting in quiet greenery uplifting. Even practices like temple meditation or prayer can bring relief. Choose what feels right—whether it’s a religious setting or a peaceful outdoor spot.

See here for more on meditation.

When You Can’t Eat

Sometimes grief eliminated my appetite completely. Being told “you must eat” only increased the pressure. When that happened, I didn’t force myself—it only added stress.

It’s ok to wait a few days until your appetite gradually returns. If you feel able, sip on fruit juice or eat soft fruit when possible. If lack of appetite persists for many days, consider consulting a healthcare professional. Otherwise, eat lightly and listen to your body.

Reference Article: Pet Loss Counseling, No Appetite, No Taste

When Everyday Life Feels Impossible

There were times I couldn’t manage household tasks or work. In those moments, leaning on others made all the difference.

Ask for help—even politely saying:

“I’m really struggling—could you help me?”
“I need a day off, please.”

Continuing in poor health only worsens recovery. Seek support from people who understand—and avoid people who might be insensitive. Opening up often leads to emotional relief or practical solutions. Trust someone reliable and share your feelings.