Hello everyone, this is Miasa from Knit My Pet.
Today’s theme is: How much do people who have never had a pet truly understand the feelings of pet loss?
While creating memorial goods for pets, I often have the opportunity to hear personal stories from my customers.
Through those conversations, I’ve come to feel that there is indeed a significant difference in perception between those who have had pets and those who haven’t.
In particular, when it comes to the death of a pet, the emotional gap seems especially noticeable.
I hope that today’s article will be helpful—even just a little—for both those who are grieving the loss of a pet and those who have never had one, so that they may better understand each other.
Some people who have never had a pet may not understand the pain of losing a pet.
Many of my customers have told me they were hurt by insensitive comments at work.
Even if someone isn’t a bad person, there are many people who view pets with emotional distance.
In fact, those people might even be the majority.
Through my work, I sometimes get the chance to talk about pets with people from banks or chambers of commerce.
On one occasion, a bank employee said something like this:
“I’ve never had a pet, so I don’t really understand, but I’ve heard it can be painful enough to make people cry.”
He was a gentle person who spoke kindly, but it seemed he didn’t quite know how to approach or understand pet loss.
Even if there’s no ill intent, hearing such calm or detached words after losing your pet can still make you feel sad.
Depending on the situation, it might even affect how you interact with that person going forward.
There’s always a chance you’ll encounter people like this.
I try to be careful myself, but sometimes I make mistakes and end up confiding in someone who isn’t the right person to talk to.
When that happens repeatedly, you may start to shut yourself off emotionally.
Please be careful.
The person you’re talking to likely isn’t a bad person—so try not to let it get you down too much.
People who don’t have pets but want to support them
This is a story about when I exhibited at a certain exhibition.
I set up a stall at the event selling these original knitted items of pets.
At that moment, one customer said this to me:
“In the past, my best friend’s cat passed away, and she looked absolutely heartbroken. I had never owned a pet myself, so I couldn’t understand why she was crying so much. It was the first time I realized just how deeply pet owners love their animals.”
She seemed like a very kind and gentle person.
And yet, even someone like her didn’t fully understand the pain of pet loss—and that made me realize for the first time that this kind of grief is hard to grasp unless you’ve experienced it yourself.
Sometimes, people might say things that come across as cold. But over time, I’ve come to think that they likely don’t mean any harm.
It’s similar to when someone doesn’t quite understand another person’s hobby or deep passion—it just doesn’t always translate well to others.
Of course, pets aren’t a hobby, but the depth of love we feel for them might not be obvious to those around us.
That said, many of those people still want to do something for those of us grieving the loss of a pet.
They want to be there for us, to offer support and compassion.
They just might not know how to do that yet.
The same customer I spoke with at the exhibition said this:
“Next time I see someone going through that kind of pain, maybe giving them a small gift would help lift their spirits?”
There truly are people—who don’t even own pets—who still want to offer comfort.
They visit my shop, place an order, and send a gift to their grieving friend or partner who’s lost a beloved pet.
To those who have lost a pet:
What I truly hope is that anyone experiencing pet loss carefully chooses who they open up to.
Sometimes, when someone says something hurtful, it might not be out of malice—we may just be interpreting it in a way that hurts us.
But misunderstandings can be resolved.
There was a customer who had never owned a pet, but wanted to do something kind for a colleague at work.
They gave them one of our cushions as a gift, and the colleague was deeply moved.
They even said their friend cried tears of joy.
It seems that, through the cushions we create, some misunderstandings have been gently resolved.
In some cases, people simply didn’t know how to offer support.
Let go of the painful moments, and instead, let’s pray for the happiness of our beloved pets now in heaven.
Knitted pet cushion
